The Doug Noll Show

My guest is Dan Millstein, author of the book The One Minute Miracle. Dan spent 18 years in prisons around the world teaching inmates how to be self-aware, non-reactive teachers of peace. His book explains a simple and elegant guided meditation composed of twelve affirmations and twelve yoga hand positions, called mudras. As each affirmation is spoken, the hands change to a different position. This simple ceremony changed prisoners and prison populations, sometimes dramatically. Today, Dan is putting out the idea of creating 108 million Teachers of Peace. Again, by affirmation, he wonders what would happen if 108 million people declared themselves each to be a Teacher Peace. More information about Dan and his work can be found at www.visionsforprisons.com and www.teacherofpeace.com . Join us for a interesting conversation about Dan’s work.
http://www.teacherofpeace.com

Dan Millstein, Author of "The One Minute Miracle"
http://www.teacherofpeace.com

Dan Millstein, Author of "The One Minute Miracle"
http://www.teacherofpeace.com

Dan Millstein, Author of "The One Minute Miracle"
http://www.teacherofpeace.com

My guest is Michael Strong, co-founder of FLOW and a pioneer in innovative education models. Michael brings an uncompromising idealistic vision for the world. His methods have been successful in developing underprivileged students as complex, thinking human beings and demonstrating the profound potential for human flourishing through innovation in educational practices. His non-profit organization, FLOW, Inc., is dedicated to the idea of Peace Through Commerce. Co-founded with the CEO of Whole Foods Markets, FLOW advances the idea that peace is more likely to emerge from economic freedom and a rule of law protecting property rights than from democracy. Tune to this fascinating discussion about conscious capitalism.
http://www.flowidealism.org/Home/about-us.html

Michael Strong, co-founder of FLOW
http://www.flowidealism.org/Home/about-us.html

Michael Strong, co-founder of FLOW
http://www.flowidealism.org/Home/about-us.html

Michael Strong, co-founder of FLOW
http://www.flowidealism.org/Home/about-us.html

The media is focused on terrorism in the Middle East, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the troubles in Pakistan, and, of course, the Presidential primaries. What is not on the media radar screen is a social, political, and ecological problem much nearer and much more crucial to us—the crushing poverty in Central America. This poverty, which has persisted for centuries, is a breeding ground for gangs, terrorists, and drugs, all of which is easily imported into the United States. This poverty may constitute a greater future security threat than anything arising overseas. Worse, because of the crushing poverty, families are abandoning their children and those children are being killed in large numbers. According to the human rights group Casa Alianza, almost 4,000 children have been murdered in Honduras over the past decade by hit men, death squads and even police officers. There is hope, however. Among the organizations working in Central America is Humanitas World Wide. My guest today is Jackie Baxman, who works with the founder Jeff Richards to bring hope through economic empowerment to the people of Honduras.

Jackie Baxman of Humanitas World Wide

Jackie Baxman of Humanitas World Wide

Jackie Baxman of Humanitas World Wide

What a great Valentine’s Day topic! Mars vs. Venus. Men and women fighting. It seems like every couple, whether dating, committed or married, at one time or another has a fight. In many relationships, the conflicts escalate until the relationship feels like it is not worth preserving. What is going on that we fight with the person we love the most? My co-host is Aleya Dao and together we explore the war between the sexes. Men and women have different perspectives, different communication styles, and different needs at different times. Aleya and I talk about these differences from the female and male perspective.

It’s not about the money! Aleya and I talk about symbolic content issues like shopping, sports, money, sex, children, parents. These seem to be what the fight is about, but not really. Tune in and find out what is really going on.

Learning to make peace with your partner. Aleya and I have some basic tools for you to make peace with your partner and we demonstrate in actual conversations how to do it. Learn how and why to create a safe space for difficult conversations, set some ground rules, and engage in various kinds of empathic listening.

Continuation of Segment 3

We expect kids up through their teens to fight with their parents. Its part of growing up and learning. But what we don’t expect are the fights between adult children and their parents. In this show, my co-host, Aleya Dao, and I take up this troublesome issue. Why do adult children fight with their parents? And how can those fights be transformed into peace. We start by identifying some of the common themes of fights between adult children and their parents, including health, money, alcohol and drug abuse, second (or third) spouses, child rearing including discipline, education, and religion, opinions about children’s spouses, and politics.

What are the hidden relationship issues? These issues drive many of the fights, and we are not aware of them. They include respect manifested by disrespect, insults; freedom manifested by unhealthy control; autonomy manifested by unhealthy or manipulative power; safety manifested by fear; love manifested by smothering and guilt; and abundance manifested by hoarding, stinginess, not being generous.

What are the hidden identity issues? They include self-esteem manifested by competition, self-worth manifested by arrogance rather than humility, gratitude and appreciation manifested by resentment, commitment to self manifested by selfishness, self-control manifested by guilt, healthy pride and self-esteem manifested by shame.

Some simple questions indicate much about how adult children respond to their parents. For example:
• Who am I if I am not my mother?
• Who is my father closer to - me or mother?
• What can I do so that my mother accepts me as an adult?
• Is it OK to be happier than my mother?
• Why do I want my mother's approval?

Violence is an all too common response to conflict. Doesn’t matter whether the violence is at home, on the streets, or between countries… it doesn’t solve conflicts. So why are we violent? What are the causes of violence and what can we do to transform potentially violent situations into peaceful resolutions? In this show, we will take some time to understand what violence is all about.

In our culture, violence is strangely seductive. Take last summer’s Bruce Willis movie, Live Free or Die Hard also known as Die Hard 4. People really enjoyed it as a fast-paced, action movie. What they don’t realize is that the Die Hard movies are a perfect example of the Myth of Redemptive Violence, a social theory that describes why violence is so seductive in our culture. Let’s learn how, as a society, we vicariously revere violence and find it deeply satisfying. We even teach this to our children in the cartoons they watch.

What can we do to stop the violence? It’s easy and it’s hard: Love the children … do everything you can to love them, hold them, hug them, and make them feel safe and protected, especially when they are very small and vulnerable. The children in your life need your time and energy. Your sons, daughters, grandsons garnddaughters, your niece, younger brother. The children you teach, coach and mentor. All need you to help them grow into healthy young adults. We learn how loving children stops violence..amazing isn’t it—that love can actually stop violence..Tune in and learn why.

Continuation of Segment 3.

Many people face the chaos of internal personal conflict and conflict with others. It seems that we are expected by our society and culture to deal with conflict as adults, yet we for the most part are not taught the skills necessary to find inner or outer peace in our lives. Imagine if those skills could be taught through horses. My guest Maja Ramsey does just that. Her Steadfast Clinic uses horses to teach people inner and outer peace skills. Maja Ramsey is a mediator and former trial lawyer. She was acclaimed by TIME Magazine as one of the top 10 women lawyers in America. Maja is a graduate of California Poly Technic University and received her law degree from La Verne Law School. She, with three other distinguished women lawyers from the San Francisco Bay Area, founded the Rock Rose Institute, which supports, promotes and advances non-violent conflict resolution through education, improved communication and a deeper understanding of justice. The Steadfast Clinic, for both experience horsemen and people who have never seen a horse before, teaches people to be present, to observe, to be in the flow. Horses are great teachers and communicators. As Maja explains, horses work best with collaboration, and learning to collaborate with horses teaches us much about conflict transformation.

Many people face the chaos of internal personal conflict and conflict with others. It seems that we are expected by our society and culture to deal with conflict as adults, yet we for the most part are not taught the skills necessary to find inner or outer peace in our lives. Imagine if those skills could be taught through horses. My guest Maja Ramsey does just that. Her Steadfast Clinic uses horses to teach people inner and outer peace skills. Maja Ramsey is a mediator and former trial lawyer. She was acclaimed by TIME Magazine as one of the top 10 women lawyers in America. Maja is a graduate of California Poly Technic University and received her law degree from La Verne Law School. She, with three other distinguished women lawyers from the San Francisco Bay Area, founded the Rock Rose Institute, which supports, promotes and advances non-violent conflict resolution through education, improved communication and a deeper understanding of justice. The Steadfast Clinic, for both experience horsemen and people who have never seen a horse before, teaches people to be present, to observe, to be in the flow. Horses are great teachers and communicators. As Maja explains, horses work best with collaboration, and learning to collaborate with horses teaches us much about conflict transformation.

Many people face the chaos of internal personal conflict and conflict with others. It seems that we are expected by our society and culture to deal with conflict as adults, yet we for the most part are not taught the skills necessary to find inner or outer peace in our lives. Imagine if those skills could be taught through horses. My guest Maja Ramsey does just that. Her Steadfast Clinic uses horses to teach people inner and outer peace skills. Maja Ramsey is a mediator and former trial lawyer. She was acclaimed by TIME Magazine as one of the top 10 women lawyers in America. Maja is a graduate of California Poly Technic University and received her law degree from La Verne Law School. She, with three other distinguished women lawyers from the San Francisco Bay Area, founded the Rock Rose Institute, which supports, promotes and advances non-violent conflict resolution through education, improved communication and a deeper understanding of justice. The Steadfast Clinic, for both experience horsemen and people who have never seen a horse before, teaches people to be present, to observe, to be in the flow. Horses are great teachers and communicators. As Maja explains, horses work best with collaboration, and learning to collaborate with horses teaches us much about conflict transformation.

Many people face the chaos of internal personal conflict and conflict with others. It seems that we are expected by our society and culture to deal with conflict as adults, yet we for the most part are not taught the skills necessary to find inner or outer peace in our lives. Imagine if those skills could be taught through horses. My guest Maja Ramsey does just that. Her Steadfast Clinic uses horses to teach people inner and outer peace skills. Maja Ramsey is a mediator and former trial lawyer. She was acclaimed by TIME Magazine as one of the top 10 women lawyers in America. Maja is a graduate of California Poly Technic University and received her law degree from La Verne Law School. She, with three other distinguished women lawyers from the San Francisco Bay Area, founded the Rock Rose Institute, which supports, promotes and advances non-violent conflict resolution through education, improved communication and a deeper understanding of justice. The Steadfast Clinic, for both experience horsemen and people who have never seen a horse before, teaches people to be present, to observe, to be in the flow. Horses are great teachers and communicators. As Maja explains, horses work best with collaboration, and learning to collaborate with horses teaches us much about conflict transformation.

Infidelity…it is one of the most common causes of conflict in marriages and commited relationships. How do we deal with the intense conflicts, feelings of betrayal, shame, anger, guilt, jealousy, and hatred that arise with infidelity? With my guest host, Aleya Dao, we bring both the masculine and feminine perspectives and invite you to listen in about this difficult topic.

Family fights can be the most intense, hostile disputes we face. In this show, Doug gives examples of various types of family fights and how they were resolved. His stories include fights over the care of elderly parents, business fights, and fights arising from greed. The secret to transforming these conflicts involve acknowledging the dispute, bringing people together, and sharing stories that are always incomplete and unfinished. Most of the time, even the worst fights can be resolved peacefully, but Doug tells of one family that simply could not find peace because the greed level was too high to overcome. Listen in as the master peacemaker talks about family fights and what can be done about them.

Family fights can be the most intense, hostile disputes we face.

Family fights can be the most intense, hostile disputes we face.

Family fights can be the most intense, hostile disputes we face.

What are the three topics your mother said never to raise in polite